Last night as I made my weary way to bed…

Last night as I made my weary way to bed, I switched off the bedroom lights and crossed the bedroom floor. As I was walking across Liv’s side, I trod on numerous laptop cables and phone chargers and something cable-like which i didn’t quite recognise. As I lay in bed, I began puzzling (in my half sleep) about this weird cable. Something wasn’t right. After about 3 minutes, the curiosity got to me and I peered over the edge of the bed. There was indeed, an unidentifed object lying 30cms from my nose. I tentively reached across and turned on the lamp… I’d like to have said I remained calm… “Snake! Snake! There’s a freakin’ snake in the room!” I bellowed to Liv who was having a (previously) relaxing shower. I don’t know how I did it, but I made it to the bathroom only placing my feet on the carpet 3 times, locking the door, hurling a towel on the floor (to block the gap between the door and floor – quite resourceful of me I thought) and jumped on the loo seat. I refused to move until Liv, who I’m not sure believed me at first, picked up the stiff and definitely dead snake and put it in the kitchen bin. Apparently the dessicated snake had been chewed on, probably by Dolly who likened it to a cat version of billtong.